So, I mentioned to Rowan that the only profound thing I’d said recently was that romance is like an instagram filter, and since they would obviously like to land me in the soup with my spicy takes, I accepted the invitation to expand on what I meant by that:
Basically, the context was that I was explaining to my therapist some recent episode of intra-community drama–I honestly don’t even remember which at this point–and I expressed my frustration that things like this kept happening when romance is fake anyway. And he was like, whoa whoa whoa, what do you mean romance is fake? And I was like, okay, you tell me: what is romance?
Because–and this is not news to my readers I’m sure–there are no behaviors or gestures that are unambiguously romantic. As a matter of fact, the things that are the most romantic are things that are highly specific to the people themselves and their context and would not be at all romantic if you swapped out even one of the parties.
There’s no there there. It’s not the content of the photo, it’s the rose-tinted filter you add on top.
And then he was like, “what’s an instagram filter?” so it kind of truncated my brilliant moment, but I do think he really grasped what I was saying in the end, so please, try it on all your muggle friends!